A change is gonna come

One way or another change comes into all of our lives. I personally find it best to not try and fight it too much. I re-read my last blog to remind myself of what I said. It hasn't been a week since that blog and I have many new thoughts and ideas and find myself in a different place than 5 days ago. Much has also happened and my brain has probably also been working in over drive just a bit as one does when you are processing something not so simple.

Last week as I mentioned I spent my hours in various states of either up or down. One thing I had decided though was to not mope about all weekend as that accomplishes nothing. So I went to google and typed "How to meet people in London", haha but it worked. I found a website called city socializing and signed up. Its a place where people can find events to go to with other people from the website. You can also create an event yourself and CS creates some larger events to really help everyone on the CS website to meet each other. So I signed up for an event of 35 people on Friday evening which was held at a bar called the Albert and Pearl in Islington. I was a bit nervous when I got there, we had a reserved room on the 1st floor. But as everyone is there to meet new people I got into the groove and started chatting round. I made pretty good friends with a very tall teacher called Matt. We chatted along with his friend Nile in the beginning then we wondered off and I met some various others who were all nice and in the end of the evening I was chatting with Matt again. Round 11pmish I had to head back to Victoria station to get the last train to Oxted. Christopher who I had met on the train coming into London earlier that evening was at Victoria after being out with other friends and rang me to see if I was heading home so we met up at the station. There was an 11:50 to Oxted that was just about to leave when I got there but Chris wanted to have a pint so I said no worries we'll catch the 12:23. Well turns out I had gotten train times confused and the 11:50 to Oxted WAS the last train. We asked a conductor what to do and he said "go to East Croyden and get off there". I tried to ask if there was a bus or something but he hurried us along as the train was about to leave so we jumped on. We got off at East Croyden and instead of finding a bus we went dancing till 3am which was an absolute blast. Afterwards we hopped over to his friends about a mile from the station where I crashed on the couch for a few hours while the rest of them chatted. Chris and I left around 5:30am and walked to the station and I was back home before 6:30. Quite a night, got a few more hours of sleep then was up getting ready for a picnic in Brixton (in SW London).

The picnic went well about 12 of us showed up for it. The dynamics were interesting. At first people were a bit cautious though nice. After a bit we started a game of footie (soccer) which I played 3min of very aggressively then was out of breath and a bit ill because I had just eaten :(. And after the game of footie everyone collapsed back on the blankets and you could just tell everyone had relaxed and we were just chatting as friends even though we had all met for the first time about 4 hrs ago. At 7p, 7 of us went on to another CS event in Covent Garden which was huge. Around 50 people showed up and it was quite loud. Had to shout to be heard which was a pity but I met quite a few nice new people there as well. So far I think the lot from the park I'll hang out with again, wouldn't be surprised if all of us actually get together again to do something. Then there was a very comical Irishman by the name of Paul I'll definitely hang out with again. He was the one person from the weekend with whom I really hit it off with. All in all I was well pleased with all the CS events I attended and I look forward to more.

Today (sunday) I just took myself out. Went for my 3.5mi walk just before it rained then went to Knole Park and took pictures of deer and had the life scared outta me when thunder clapped right over my head. After that headed to the movies. I ended up there about 1.5hrs early so I went to a near by Italian place for some drinks and a tomato soup. As I was sitting at the bar two ladies were chatting and I heard them mention the cinema so when one went off to the loo I asked the other what they were going to see and then we got chatting. In the end I walked off with both their numbers and the promise to have girly drinks sometime :).

Now Sunday evening a full week after things changed quite dramatically I find that I have in fact gained a lot more than I lost. Now that is no offense to Ross who as I have said is an incredible person. But the relationship wasn't really working out. We failed to truly connect for various reasons and it became more about me putting much more energy into it all than I really should have, which is what I do. Now I have the freedom and the energy back to do the things in life I want to. I've met so many people this weekend. I must have talked to at least 30 new people in 48hours. As my therapist has said I have to practice putting my eggs into multiple baskets. When I came here I put every egg into the Ross basket and didn't have any left for myself. Now I've got em all back in the me basket and I'm dolling them out. Some for my new friends. A few into the exercise basket and some into the job research basket etc. I feel I've come to the place in my life I've been searching for for several years but when I started looking for this place I was too young to be here and now I find I'm in the right place at the right time. So to everyone of you that read this and even those that don't thank you for being part of my life. I am enjoying this person I have become and I couldn't be this person without everyone of you. You have all taught me something wether you are aware of it or not so thank you. Love you all millions and millions. Now go have a lovely day or evening and enjoy the week ahead. LETS GO ENGLAND for the world cup!!!!!!!!!!! They play US this Sunday 8:30p South African time. WOOOOOO, were gonna whoop your butts US :p.
buwahahaha
xxx
Bron